Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
should my penis look like a turkey
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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