I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
honey bunches of taint.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Randomize
