What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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