..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
