i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize
