Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
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