Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
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