What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize
