What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Randomize
