well you can't waste a boner
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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