He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
