I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Oh god it's open bar.
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