He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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