Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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