James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize
