I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
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