My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
