no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
