Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
