You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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