whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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