Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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