My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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