In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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