took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Randomize