it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
