The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
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