I accidentally had phone sex last night
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
sick fucks of a feather flock together
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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