everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
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