he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
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Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
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That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
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