so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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