What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
