I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
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