Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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