Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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