I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
no you cant smoke seaweed
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Randomize
