i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
