he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Green mimosas i think yes
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Randomize
