There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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