just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
