He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
