I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
