About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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