I'm lost and stupid without you.
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Randomize
