Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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