Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
