I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Randomize
