i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
