Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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