Im at strip club and am horny
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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